Admin and accounts manager
Why did you say yes to this campaign? What was your WHY to participate?
I always shy away from the camera and there are very few pictures of me, if something ever happened to me I’d like my son and husband to be able to look at this beautiful picture where I’m not hiding behind something or someone. I find I’m always doing everything for everyone else, being a wife and mother makes you lose a piece of yourself and you always spread yourself thin to make sure they are all OK. So this will be for me to kick start my confidence and make me feel like I matter too.
Tell me a little about you and your story:
I’m a simple girl, more of a tomboy really. I prefer hanging with the boys talking about cars, bikes, machinery and all that rather than talking about hair and makeup. I like to have nice hair, nails and makeup but it wouldn’t bother me if I didn’t, I would be more upset if I scuffed my alloy than if I broke a nail. I was 31 when I got married, I was never going to get married or have children, it was a decision I had made when I was younger. I knew James through work for 9yrs before we started going out, that was Dec 2011, the following Feb I asked him to marry me. We were married on the 12-12-2012, almost a year to the day we started dating. 3 yrs later Jackson came along. We have lost many Angels and Jackson doesn’t have any siblings. I feel really bad for Jackson that I haven’t been able to give him a brother or sister and feel I have failed James and all the angels we have had to say goodbye to and sometimes I am hard on myself for that. I think this will make me see what other people see when they look at me and I might just give myself a break.
What do you see when you look in the mirror?
I actually think I have reverse body dysmorphia, when I look in the mirror I think, hey you don’t look too bad, you look quite lean and then I see myself in a window and think jeez did you actually leave the house like that, them spare tyres are real you know! Mentally, I see a person who is kind and caring but has a lot of trouble letting go and giving up control over things.
Describe yourself in 3 words:
Flirty, loyal and honest.
Do you feel like you have changed since turning 40?
I feel I am less tolerant, I think a lot of things that never bugged me before when I was younger definitely bug me now because I’m older and I feel I no longer need to accept things the way they are. I question things more, I say no more, I’ve stopped being a people pleaser and stopped worrying about stuff I can’t change. I try and change the things I can and have learned to live with it, life is short and we don’t get a second run at it so we need to make the most of what we have.
What advice would you give to your younger self about caring for yourself?
Use the gym memberships, fall in love with the gym when you are in your 20’s and carve out a happy place for yourself. Care less about what other people think because they don’t matter. Those who matter don’t care and those who care don’t matter. Don’t be afraid of things, dive in head first and see what happens.
What do you consider self-love?
Being able to look yourself in the eye and be honest with yourself, stop lying to yourself and stop giving up on yourself.
What do you love most about your new portraits? Is there something new you discovered about yourself?
I never do photos, I’m always the one taking the pictures because I don’t like myself in them. I love how empowered they make me feel, I look amazing and I would never have imagined I could look that good. I’m very self-conscious about my weight, my mummy pouch, my teeth and all that other stuff. I think it’s so important to have memories like this of me pushing my boundaries and embracing my natural beauty that I don’t see all the time, or choose not to see. I have a beautiful little boy Jackson and this is a great lesson for him to push himself to do things he wouldn’t ordinarily do and to enjoy them and remember that it’s OK to be scared, the end result may just take your breath away like this has done for me.
What was your favourite part of working with me?
My favourite part of working with you was how comfortable and relaxed you make people feel. You make it a fun, positive experience and I love how creative you are. You have these amazing ideas that only you can see, you push people out of their comfort zone without them really noticing and that is a gift. From the beginning of me signing up for this you have been so amazing, I love how nothing fazes you and you can see potential in the most unlikely of ways. You are a very warm and welcoming person, it’s like meeting up with an old friend you haven’t seen for a while and if I gained nothing more from this experience except meeting you it was a day well spent.